Life sucks!

And that's an understatement!

Hahahaa...

I seem to be filling up my blog with pretty depressing angsty stuff lately. (By the way, it's "angst-y" and not "ang-sty", ladies and germs!)

So my blog is not only pathetic, it's now full of angst and depressing as well.

More ha ha ha-ing...

And the funny thing is, everbody around me seems depressed as well.

Well, depression comes in many forms and takes on many shapes.

For me, I'm gaining weight because I'm too depressed (and too sick as well) to exercise. So all I seem to do all day is to sit on my butt, and eat, and sniff and cough and whine.

For some other people (hmph!), they lose weight when they're depressed. They also change their jobs and paint their nails slut-red at the same time.

Some of us MSN non-stop when depressed, exchanging juicy gossip about their boss, and making fun of irritating male colleagues in the work place. They also laugh a lot, and their eyes look even bigger and more bambi-like.

The richer ones go to beach resorts all over the world, and tan almost naked. The word "almost" is very critical apparently. Although, to me, naked and almost naked is almost the same thing. (2cm of cloth a lot of difference meh?!)

Omigod, I'm beginning to sound like Mary Alice in Desperate Housewives! You know how she does that running commentary thing at the beginning and at the end of every episode? Oh crap!

I think I'm becoming one of those people that you didn't want to be when you were young and good-looking and enjoying yourself. I'm becoming old and fat and boring and stoopid and grouchy and grumpy. Somebody please kill me and end my misery!!

Speaking of dying, how many pills does one have to pop before one dies of drug overdose? I think I'll google that and check it out....

But then, E and I already made plans, to jump together off Niang's flat onto the jogging track below. But Niang too busy to entertain our suicide requests nowadays. (Can you imagine, waddling quite happily on jogging track, and then suddenly 2 bodies are hurled to the ground, one after the other. I think will be traumatised for life eh!)

I'm convinced dying's still the best way of solving one's problems. It may be a selfish thing to inflict on loved ones, not to mention it being morally suspect, but it's definitely effective in terms of eliminating life's miseries.

Killing the people who hurt us or caused us to be depressed is another way. Let me count the number of people I have to kill... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5...... Oh forget it, it's too much hassle. And after killing them, I'll get more depressed because I have to spend the rest of my life in a little cell and be somebody's bitch.

Or you can do what I've been doing, shutting myself at home and indulging in therapy time - watching TV, laughing myself silly reading funny books, and harassing my friends online, sexually or otherwise, and just shutting out the world until I feel mentally and emotionally better able to deal with all the crap.

In the meantime, I'm eternally grateful to all my friends who have been acquiescing to my constant requests for entertainment, whether on Instant Messaging or face-to-face. They have their own lives and their own troubles and their own miseries, but they let me pretend that I'm the most miserable person on the whole earth, and let me whine and gripe and complain away. Sometimes, if they're depressed too, we take turns to complain.

Hahahaaa

Well, I guess life's not that bad after all.

It could be a lot worse. I could have no friends to hear me complain.

And if that happens, I think I'll really kill myself....