Off with ALL their heads!

I used to be a very powerful person.

The secret to all power is, not caring about anything or anybody. It may sound ridiculous, but try it, and you'll find it to be quite true.

When you don't care about anything or anyone, nothing and no one can ever screw with your mental or emotional processes. You'll be able to make decisions at all level, hampereds by no such thing as consideration for other things or other people. The only thing imperative to you and to everything you think and do is, yourself.

Now isn't that a simple and direct route to being all-powerful?

It's really a much more simple life. One no longer has to think about the impact each action and word has on the next person, and how to come up with premptive ways to spare somebody else his/her problems. One no longer has to consider other people's conveniences, preferences or tricky situations. The world centres around a single person, and with that, the unimportantly superflous and the peripherals would be removed.

How simple. How fun. How self-empowering.

But one day, I chose to relinquish that power because I wanted to be a better person. And now, I find myself besieged with all sorts of considerations, concerns and worries, which I otherwise else would not have.

I really miss the good old days. It's not difficult to become that sort of a person again. Even if I didn't like myself as much, I will at least have less clutter in my life.

Because, sometimes, one wonders, is it worth it, my trying so hard to do my part as a friend, as a colleague, as a confidante, as a companion, as a good citizen of the world? The rewards seem greater, and the burden non-existent, my being a selfish, self-centered, and conceited ass with an attitude problem.

No wonder good people die young.

I'm already feeling the life ebbing out of me and my heart becoming increasingly weaker with every pummeling I'm receiving, and this is happening on quite a regular basis; it seems the world and its inhabitants are going to the dogs.

I think the only way I can feel better again is to go for a massage and a hair-cut and a whole day in bed with a good book. I think I'll curl my hair and go on a shopping spree and go to the movies and eat pop-corn as well!

Then I'll come back and decide whose heads I want chopped off!

I should feel better after that very therapeutic beheading exercise.