The Life of Jacob
Jacob was born determined. He was determined to wring all that he can out of life and what life has to offer him. He was determined to be a success. Even as early as a foetus in his mother's womb, he was already fighting with his twin brother for more of what his mother has - her life, her blood, her attention. Even entering the world, he fought hard to be first, and even when he couldn't be first-born, he came out into the light of the world fast and grasping, holding on to his brother's heel, determined to waste no time in catching up with his brother. Even his name Jacob meant "Supplanter", which means he is to substitute, and to displace; he means to be his brother.
Unlike his lively dashing brother, who was loved by his Father for being a man of the outdoors and for being a skilled hunter to boot, Jacob was a plain and quiet man who spent most of his time in the tents with his mother. He was the favourite with Rebekah, but what use was his Mother's favour since it's his brother his Father favours.
Esau was arrogant and proud, of his skill, his daring, his power. He was a selfish barbarous brute, a man of animal passions. He willingly gave up his birthright as first-born son to exchange it for a bowl of stew, so gluttonous and gross was he. In his uncontrolled lust and need for instant gratifications, he took for himself women from amongst the people he was living, from outside his family, bringing anguish and grief to his parent by his wild living.
Issac grew old and he knew his days were nearly over, he could barely even see now. It was time to transfer the blessings and the call of God upon his life to his children. I never understood why the need for duplicity, why the need for deceit, but Rebekah tricked her husband into improperly blessing Jacob with the the first-born's blessing.
Was it because of what God said to her when Esau and Jacob were still babies in her womb, but struggling together, that the younger would serve the older that she took it upon herself to "help" God in His plans? Perhaps some of Jacob's cunning and slyness were a result of his relationship with his mother who taught him how to manipulate, connive, to trick? Oh did she serve him a wrong turn by teaching him all those things that would have defined him then and forever as a conniver, a trickster? A mother wishes only the best for her children, but sometimes, mothers do more wrong than good for their children when they teach their child to conspire and to scheme to overcome their natural weaknesses, to constantly be in conflict with the brother. A mild and gentle man child may turn schemer if he is constantly thinking that this is the only way he can win, to get his father's attention, to get what he deserves.
Poor poor Jacob. The insecurities, and the anguish that he must have gone through. And the idea that he was misunderstood and unwanted by man and by God, and that the only way he can even get what he deserved was through trickery and contrivance. All that he ever got out of life so far, he got by contrivance - the birth-right stolen by his brother during a weak and vulnerable moment, the blessing of the first-born that he stole from his father by pretending to be something and someone else. When oh when will he get something he could call his own? When oh when will it be his time?
Driven from his home by his brother's murderous anger, just when he thought he was at the lowest point of his life, he met the God of his Father and Grandfather for the very first time; he realised that he's not alone, but a omnipotent and loving Being stood watching over him, and the blessing of the Almighty was far greater and superior to even the blessing of the First-Born. Now, not only he was blessed but his numerous descendants were to be blessed as well, and not only will they be blessed, but through them, the families of the whole earth will be blessed. No longer a blessing for a single person, but one who extended to the offspring, the offspring's offspring, and all who were connected and related to Jacob's descendants. At that point, Jacob knew that he didn't have to try and to scheme so hard anymore; he had someone who would be with him, who would take care of the clothes and food he needed. He could now afford to be generous, and loosen his tight-fistedness, he swore to give back to God 10% of all that God gives him. He also set up a altar to commerate his first encounter with God; before this point in his life, there was nothing worth remembering or commemorating. This was the beginning of the rest of his life.
Things started to look up after that. It could be because he has left the shelteredness of his home. Or it could even be that dream he had when it seemed that he met God. (Dreams always become less substantial with the passing of time.) He'd met the girl of his dreams and was working hard every day to win her love. The end of the seven long years drew near, it was almost time for him to be finally married to his lady love, Rachel. God has been kind to him, giving him clothes to wear and food to eat, even though his Uncle was a miserly slave-driver who grudged him his salaries. But it was still good, if he hadn't left his home, he wouldn't have met Rachel, so something good did come out of something bad.
Just when he thought the One Up There was in on His throne and everything was working out, he woke up the next morning of his wedding and found, not Rachel, but her sister lying there. Rage filled him all the more as he felt his impotence and powerlessness in the situation, he realised that the world was punishing honesty and integrity. It was his hard work that helped his Uncle to grow rich with possessions, cattle and sheep, but instead of being grateful, Laban was seeking to exploit him even further, so there seemed no point in doing the right thing?
Interestingly, it was God who showed Jacob how to counteract his Uncle's deviousness. He showed Jacob in a dream how to breed streaked, speckled and spotted cattle in a supernatural way. Because Laban played dirty on his promise to Jacob and separated the cattle so that they would not produce streaked, speckled and spotted kid which he promised Jacob he could have. So maybe there's a way after all to counteract the devious machinations of what most people thinks as shrewdness and smartness but which I define as pure dishonesty. So maybe there's something about being friends with One who can teach you to do good things and still win!
So now, with Laban beat and ousted, and with many streaked, speckled and spotted cattle and sheep, Jacob set off with everything and everybody, to go home. Many years ago, when first encountering God, he vowed to God saying if He would allow him to go home in peace, despite his brother's murderous hate for him, he would acknowledge his father's God to be his God. (I find that a thoroughly sensible thing to do; find God for yourself, and not think of Him based on somebody else's experiences or rhetoric. You'll find yourself silly and embarrassed if you profess either one of the two opinions, just based on hearsay, but without personal intimate knowledge and research I say.)
But Jacob was afraid, very afraid. Despite God showing him His armies alongside him, he was too unfamiliar with the supernatural and the divine to believe what his eyes show in the alternative world of God and angels, he just knew he was very afraid of his brother. The fear and awe he felt for his brother through those growing-up years had not abated at all. He was still the scrawny weak Jacob of old, growing up with Esau and envying his brother's strength and power, and his older-brother status. Nothing had changed, never mind what success he had achieve. With the birth-right and the first-born blessing and all that wealth, the wives he married, the sons he had spawned, he still remained as what he was all along - the Jacob who was always playing second-fiddle to Esau. There did not seem to be any use in having tried so hard; having came this far, and having came back full circle, back where he was from.
He sent all his servants and possessions ahead of him, putting distance between himself and his Nemesis, to appease him, to buy time, to perhaps gain his favour so he would not kill Jacob. It had finally come down to this, the showdown between the 2 brothers.
In a desperate bid for help, he stayed alone to meet with God. A Man came and wrestled with him. Jacob fought, like how he fought in Rachel's womb, like how he fought to be strong and manly just like his brother, lie how he fought for his father's affection, like how he fought for Rachel, like how he fought to not let the people and the world around him cheat him of what he thought he deserved and belonged to him; Jacob fought with all that he had; he would not let go until the Man blessed him, with what he wanted and desired, so that he would no longer have to fight. So that he would no longer be a supplanter, a schemer, a trickster, a swindler; he never liked being those, but he had to be those, for the sake of his future. But what future was there awaiting him if Esau did not let him live? There was no scheming his way out of this now.
Finally, the Man said, and I will para-phrase what I think He said.
"You have contended and have power with God and men and have prevailed. Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel. You are no longer a Supplanter, but one who has Contended with God. You have met your Nemesis and overcomed him. Your Nemesis is not your brother; it is you. You have fought with yourself, and you have won and overcomed your old nature. You are no longer the person you were before, the one you hated and despised in spite and despite of yourself. You wanted to be blessed, but not through trickery and contrivance, but you had no choice, or so you thought. But know now that you are blessed, because I said so. There's no need to fight anymore."
And from that day onwards, Jacob limped when he walked. His life was now in the Man's hands, there was no need for him to run or fight anymore. The Man was in charge now. And he will make sure Jacob no longer has to run or fight for his survival.
No comments:
Post a Comment